A Two-Step Dance

So much has happened in my life the past four years, so many changes and transitions that have been devastating and disorienting. But also, as I look back, I can see ways that these years have brought clarity and growth in the midst of the unsettling times.    

At my church there is a banner with the words, 

Desire and Pay Attention, the two-step dance of the spiritual journey.  

When I first read this years ago, I felt the truth of it in my bones, and unknowingly over the years, they have become a guiding force in my life. These words come to me time and time again, especially on the days I feel most lost and confused. What do I desire for my life and what do I value? Interestingly then, the directive is not to grasp or to grind, force or battle, but to pay attention. Be still and listen, then pay attention to what is coming up from within. The listening part is crucial, because many times what comes up is quiet and subtle, even simple, although not always easy. Action of some kind is eventually needed, but the desiring and paying attention needs to come first so you can be sure that your actions are soul centered and grounded in integrity. 

I turned 50 this year, and I find myself at another transition point as my roles in life are changing again. My next direction doesn’t feel clear, so my plan for the rest of this month and into January is to desire and pay attention, and then listen. Listen for what is next. Think about what I desire for myself and the world, and watch for ideas about how I can participate in the care and healing of both. 

I welcome you to join me.